he says he's married to a crazywoman

32 Years ago today....and then 17 yrs ago...Mornings of December 7th are nice...

2011-12-07T12:03:00.000-08:00

TODAY.......

December 7th....This guy has been my husband for 32 years....sometimes we don't get along, sometimes we fight, sometimes we fight ALOT, sometimes he is not so good to me, sometimes I am not so good to him....but when I saw this picture from our Oct 2011 Fam Photo Shoot and how much fun we still have being together......I think that we should keep working at it until we get it right.....

And then on December 7th, 1990, I remember that morning....it was a frosty cold day on the prairie of Colorado that I birthed Winter Rose at home in my bedroom and her poppa, my hubby Bo, just barely caught her in his arms and changed her name to Winter Rose!

Happy 17th Birthday Hunny!

RIP Dan Wheldon & James Packard and others that the track has taken...

2011-10-16T23:41:00.000-07:00

Betty, Lisa and Jim Packard at Indy 500, May 1960

I was born to a millionaire, but he didn’t know it then. There were still races to win and years to live. He would have let me work with him in the business because he trusted my mother and I am like her, smart and business-minded. He would have built a great empire in the racing world had he lived....I would have been treated like a princess, a real southern brat, I meant belle.


Dan Wheldon with the Borg Warner Trophy

But it didn’t work out the way it was supposed to. My daddy he got killed in a race car in Fairfield, Illinois on my mother’s birthday. I was 11 months old and missed him every day, ‘where was my kiss, daddy?’, ‘where was my daddy?’ My mother, who was very pregnant with my brother couldn’t answer, choosing unconsciously, protectively to stare out the window without a tear. Stoic she felt was the best way to handle this event, but in so choosing she drove a wedge between me and her that no one could ever figure out how to remove. She grieved him more in later life it seemed than at that moment, but people grieve in different ways. I learned to understand her and let go, but the wedge remained to remind us of our loss.

My brother, on the other hand, grieved a grief that few know of; when we were young and skipped school together and sat by the creek smoking mom’s Viceroys, he would say as he looked at me, “I never felt my father’s touch.” .....What do you say to a pain like that? I just puffed and handed him the cigarette for his turn….within a few years I would do the same with a joint and we would feel a bit mellow but the pain remained and does still.

Dan Wheldon died October 16, 2011

I was at a race once, after being a mom myself for nearly 30 years and I happened to turn my head just right to see a young girl of maybe 10 or 11 give her daddy a hug. He was dressed in a driver’s suit and turned to walk after his car as it was pushed from the garage towards the starting line. I choked on my emotion and I couldn’t breathe. If there is a God, please don’t let that be the last time that she gets to hug her daddy.

Dan Wheldon at Las Vegas Raceway where he died on the track 2011

It happened again today, another child’s daddy taken by the track, so young and oh so sweet his boys looked in all the pictures I poured over, driven to find, driven to relive as if somehow watching the horrific crash would scald the pain that still resides in me into numbness.

But no such luck, the witness, the pictures, the YouTube just made my pain sharp and raw.

And now there is nothing left to say, there are no words and to steal a phrase from a woman that has experienced such pain and sorrow, death comes quietly as if on cat paws in the night.

I am EQUAL.....

2011-09-21T17:06:00.000-07:00

I was happy to see a picture of a couple getting married. They were obviously in love, you can see it in their faces.

For some this picture causes controversy....it is a picture of 2 men, more so it is a picture of a United States Military Officer marrying his partner.

The U.S. military closes the books on "don't ask, don't tell." Navy Lieutenant Gary Ross and his partner celebrated the end of "don't ask, don't tell" with a Vermont wedding just after midnight, when repeal officially took effect.

Some history of dadt here:US politics live blog: 'Don't ask, don't tell' repeal.

For me? I am happy for them....there needs to be more love in the world, more romance, more understanding, more tolerance.

As a young girl I was exposed to intolerance, bullying, division, racism and more at an early age. Born at the end of the 1950's, racism was still alive and well, even in my extended family.

As a 4 and 5 year old I was brutally treated by my neighbors, not just the kids, but their parents. Why? Because my mom was a widow and refused to marry immediately after my fathers death. That was a time when a woman 'HAD TO HAVE A MAN' and how dare her to not remarry soon. My mom on the other hand was young and shell-shocked to be widowed so soon after her marriage to her soul-mate. She was waiting for a guy that would be a good father to me and my brother and a good husband to her. It was a tall order and she never found a guy to be both instead marrying a good companion for herself when I was a senior in High School.

The people of my small town could not fathom such a thing and it created such agitation in them that they grew angrier and angrier and more brutal as the years went on.

I remember as a young girl, maybe 8 or so, calling my classmates to see if they could play. Their parents would get on the phone and say, "Don't call here again, you can't play with our kids." - the reason was that my mom was single.

When I was in third grade the kids started bringing to school the anger that their parents carried, one day during PE some girls through my clothes in the toilet....it wasn't just any outfit, it was a cherished jumper that my very elegant and charismatic Grandma Juanita gave me....it was zebra striped and I felt so glamorous and pretty in it.....I came back to the bathroom to find it stuffed in the toilet....it brings tears to my eyes to this day.

Even the teachers bullied me, one going so far as to pull my ponytail so hard during lunch that it brought tears. I never went back to lunch at school. That was a time when we got an hour lunch to walk home...you know, all mothers were at home waiting for their kids....only the poor, stupid kids had to stay at school for lunch and the teachers hated being there. I never went back....when my mom found out that I was going home for lunch she had me take my brother too....I was happy to take him as I loved him and we were company for each other.

My brother was always quieter than I was, God only knows how he was treated at school and in the neighborhood....so I started cooking lunch for my brother and I at the tender age of 8 or 9. We were in Junior High before we knew that you are supposed to brown the hamburger before you put in the Manwich sauce.

Things always got worse, never better, both my brother and I barely escaped with our sanity from our small town and I am not sure that what you call sanity is what we live in to this day, but we are both happy, mostly and successful.

These years of mistreatment just because I was different, because we were different, ingrained in me a fierce understanding of what it feels like to be different and I will defend over and over again those that need defending.....

To quote someone else, "I have a dream when people will not be judged by the color of their skin, whom they love or how they look, but by who they are."

Casey Heynes has had enough and body slams bully....

2011-03-15T00:08:00.000-07:00

I heard about this video and searched into the wee hours of the morning to find a posting of it that I could download.

Youtube has banned it and I wanted all to see it....please forgive me...it is horrific to see this gentle giant bullied.....

Also forgive the graininess of this video, but it must be seen none-the-less.

Here is what I could find about this young man Casey.

"Australian student Casey Heynes —an unofficial anti-bullying PSA posterboy—when he was captured on video bodyslamming a bully that had hit him in the face. The (much smaller) bully taunted and hit Casey after school while other kids laughed and videotaped the whole incident.

Eventually, the much-bigger Casey could take no more, as he picked up the scrawny antagonizer and smashed him hard onto the concrete.

The youtube description states that Casey's had enough. He "has been bullied his whole school life," says the video description, "and this is what happens when he snaps!!"

The YouTube page provided the following information, allegedly from Casey’s friend’s father:

“This 16 year old kid has been tormented every single day of his short high school life – and today he snapped!! He was suspended and may be looking at criminal charges, all because this little runt thought he could make an example of Casey in front of his “tough buddies!!”

There are facebook pages to support Casey who allegedly has been suspended from school.

So many people are showing support to this young man...

Casey Heynes Public Figure

Casey Heynes - Bully Slapdown - group trying to raise a scholarship fund for Casey

Casey stands there and takes a slug and then another one, he is a gentle giant...he doesn't want to hurt anyone, he is trying to say, "hey, leave me alone" the bullies friends are videotaping so they can show how 'tough' they are as they bully another boy.

Casey trys again to deflect another punch and then another.

He has had it and instead of punching, because punching is bad, he wrestles the bully and then picks up the kid and slams him to the ground....

Listen people, in a young boys mind picking up and slamming your attacker is much less violent than punching him in the face....Casey did all he could....

All he wanted was to get away....Please watch as Casey is walking away! I can guarentee you that he is crying, he never wanted to hurt anyone!

WHEN ARE WE GOING TO STOP BULLYING???

Kudos to the girl who steps in to stop the other bully from going after Casey.....

Questions?

How can a boy be bullied everyday and no one give a DAMN and stop it?

Where are the school administrators?

Where are the parents?

Where is anyone to give a damn?

We as parents need to get involved!

We have to take a stand and stop bullys, we need to teach our kids to take a stand and stop each and every bullying act they see and to immedaitely come home and tell us what happened.

We as a people need to take a ZERO tolerance against bullying!

'Kiss and Tell' - Brandon Davies and Danica Mendivil

2011-03-03T23:06:00.000-08:00

Brandon Davies BYU suspended player

I thought that every young man was taught that he wasn’t supposed to kiss and tell, but here we have Brandon Davies tearfully admitting to his entire damn locker room that he had sex with his girlfriend…OH MY GOD! I have heard of tragedies in my day, but I don’t think that the tragedy of making love to your girlfriend of 3 years is one that needs to be confessed to the whole damn locker room….shame on the people that either expected it, wanted it or condoned it…

Today we have heard so much rhetoric about premarital sex and the arguments for and against as they were bantered back and forth. A young man has most likely thrown away a pretty promising career and maybe even that of a few of his friends because he was taught that premarital sex was bad, and then he went ahead and loved his girlfriend and made love to her anyway….

Wow… here is what some of the players had to say according to NYDailynews.com, Davies is said to be, "extremely remorseful, heartbroken" a source told The Tribune. The team's best player, Jimmer Fredette, recounted Davies' apology. "He told us everything. He told us he was sorry and that he let us down," Fredette said. (told them everything???)


Brandon Davies girlfriend	Danica Mendivil

Heartbroken? Tearful? This poor young man and his girlfriend, Danica Mendivil, a freshman on the volleyball team at Arizona State University, most likely will never sleep together again or with anyone else. Talk about making someone feel really awful about sex!

Now I am not saying that BYU should not have done what they did. If players were required to wear purple toe nail polish, then they gotta do just that, what rules the coach makes, or school makes, well those rules are followed or you are off. Brandon knew all about those rules. 

But what concerns me is the tragedy of two young people who obviously care for each other...and then were made to feel that they have done such a terrible wrong that it required tears and locker room confessions! 

I really believe that this whole story is about 2 people who love each other.  The world does not need more sexually messed young people, and this is exactly what is happening here. I feel sorry for Brandon and Danica…and not because they have ‘sinned’!

I want to go down in history as the old woman who loved facebook!

2011-02-27T12:20:00.000-08:00

My dear friend Tom Henry, Professor at UVU, posted this as his facebook status one day:

I used to think Facebook was the pinnacle of narcissism, the summit of self-love... but now, I think of Facebook as: The Happy News... babies born, cute kids adorn, engagements, marriages, baptisms, old friends getting together, hot chicks, cool dudes, pictures of my hot wife at my disposal, old friends, new friends, family members, interesting commentary, weird videos...

----------

I want to go down in history as the 50 year old woman who loved facebook!

Here is my response to his status post:

Oh Tom! You have it so right! Some people like to pontificate on here, but by far and away the huge majority of facebook is connecting...connecting!

Connecting is a lost art in these crazy days...facebook is our way of connecting and reconnecting with all the people that we care about, just as you said:...
" we get to see babies born, cute kids adorn, engagements, marriages, baptisms, old friends getting together, hot chicks from my past and present, pictures of my hot wife at my disposal, old friends, new friends, family members, interesting commentary, weird videos".....

...and then we get to hear about the bad news that we would have missed if it weren't for our facebook homepage news feed...even if all we can respond to our friends tragedies and bad news is with a simple, "oh I am so sorry, I care"...that is so much more than we would have done if we didn't have facebook to connect us.....

So many times in the darkness of life, my simple facebook status has rallied my friends around me and they have sent short sentences of caring, concern and support....this outpouring of friendship and love would never have happened if I did not have a 'social utility to keep me connected with my friends and family'.....facebook is an incredible way to stay connected!

Happy Valentine's Day Hunny......

2011-02-13T19:37:00.000-08:00

Tomorrow is Valentine's Day and much like lots of every other days.....we will be busy at new jobs, overwhelmed inside with each of our individual worries and collective family concerns....

There won't be presents, a card or two, just another year that things didn't work out to make it a priority to doing something nice for each other ON THE DAY...

Yeah I wanted to get you a watch, and you wanted to get me a car stereo, but LIFE GOT IN THE WAY as it always does.....

So here we sit, miles away form each other, missing each other, both wondering what the future holds...

I forgot to get my kids a dang thing....

Tomorrow is Valentine's Day and I just totally messed it up and life got in the way..........

Struggling to keep my head above water....

2011-02-09T08:33:00.000-08:00

I did this like I do so many things in my life. I jumped right in, both feet first, fully clothed, even my shoes still on, wearing a down parka and jeans.

Now as I look for someone to help me as I struggle to keep my head above water from the constant weight of a 40 hour a week job, my last semester of my Bachelor degree, the guilt of leaving a young child in the care of others and the loneliness, the aching loneliness of being gone from my home and family…..I see that I left my support system behind…I don’t know how much of one that I had, but whatever I had, I keenly feel it’s absence.

Life only gives you what you make it...

I never really thought much about down the road; what this would all look like in a month, 3 months or a year, I just knew that I had to do it.

Damn this economy and damn this life that a mother can’t figure out how to be a mom and work and make good money.

I find myself at 50, chubby and smart…where do I fit in? I work with great people, but I didn’t bust my ass for a Bachelor of Science in Business Management to sit on a dialer all day long.

I worked so hard to build so much momentum for myself. I know it will pay off, but patience has never been a virtue of mine.

......the saga of a newly working mom....

2011-01-14T18:35:00.000-08:00


My first day going to work December 27th, 2010

In the blink of an eye, and with no fanfare what so ever, on Monday (December 27^th), I joined the rank of working mothers.

I have worked on and off for decades, but always from my home and with my own schedule. Now I work a regular 8-5 job with regular rules and of course regular pay.

My thoughts run the gamut, my feelings hurt, I am euphoric. After 30 years of birthing, breastfeeding and raising 6 kids, I had always thought that my reward would be something quite different than getting up 5 days a week at ZERO-dark: thirty and leaving my home. Due to this down-turned economy, ‘The Great Recession’ was my reward. No matter how hard I try, I can truly find no real person to blame.

So far I have battled extreme guilt, anguish and second thoughts about leaving my kids and my home. I wonder if the guilt ever truly goes away and maybe someday I will know, but for now my youngest at home is 10 and in a few short years he will be just fine hanging out with his friends and looking forward to when Mom gets home with dinner and smiles, so he can be with her….

Euphorically I look forward to the pay and a chance to be part of a team that provides the sustenance for our family to live in and navigate this world. My pay gives my family the chance to have dependable vehicles, warmer houses, newer appliances that don’t break down, better educations and so many other things.

In a few shorts weeks my life changed so much and I am sure the upcoming months will only give me more of the same.

We move into a new house within a few weeks, leaving behind family and friends that mean so much to us. So very much to me.

Last week we bought a new car and will hire before and after school care for Tuffy. I most likely will pare down my push for my degree taking only 3 classes this semester instead of 5 and that will leave 3 classes to complete in the summer. I will still ‘graduate’ April of 2011 by ‘walking’ in graduation ceremonies, but not receive my diploma until the missing classes are completed in the summer.

My husband begins a new job with Homeland Security and will be home every night and ALL holidays, unless there is an emergency, then he reports to the ‘command center’.

I hope these changes bring goodness and hope to our family and not sadness and regret.

For now the only way to go and the only thing to do is to push forward…I am grateful to have a job in such uncertain times, I am grateful for cool kids and a husband who wants to be the best husband a woman can have.

I will do my best to be as wonderful as my children and my hubby.

James Taylor & Carly Simon - Close Your Eyes

2010-11-06T16:27:00.000-07:00

In one month, I will have been married 31 years, sometimes hard, sometimes not....but my hubby sent :
Well the sun is surely sinking down,
but the moon is slowly rising.
So this old world must still be spinning around,
and I still love you.
CHORUS:
So close your eyes;
you can close your eyes, it's all right.
I don't know no love songs,
and I can't sing the blues any more.
But I can sing this song,
and you can sing this song
when I'm gone.
It won't be long before another day.
We're gonna have a good time.
And no one's gonna take that time away.
You can stay as long as you like.

Friday July 9th, I sat in the Courtroom and watched JUSTICE HAPPEN for Ken Dolezsar!

2010-08-04T00:42:00.000-07:00

eugene wright is a killer. Here is what a jury member had to say in the comments section of the story that day on KSL.

"""Thank goodness he was finally sentenced! I was on that jury and wright saying he didn't do it is the most ridiculous thing I have ever heard. If he did not commit this murder the person who did has to have had the same DNA as Wright, look exactly like Wright, somehow gotten Wright's prepaid phone he bought to call Dolezsar to set up that meeting and somehow got Wright's gun to kill Dolezsar.

UNLIKELY!! Him and his lawyers tried very hard to throw the truth, but in the end it is all there and leads directly to Wright. This man [wright] is the cockiest man I have ever seen. All through court he had that same look on his face that they caught with the news cameras. That look was "I'm gonna get away with this." He better be in prison for life!"""

Well I was there and I saw that look too, he really acts like a bird with a canary in his mouth. Well eugene wright, you are in prison and I wish you would rot there.

You took the life of a man that was 1,000 times more than you will ever be!

JUSTICE IS SERVED!!!

There are those who want to muddy the waters with talk of others, but this day the killer of Ken Dolezsar was sent to prison. HELL is too good for wright, he deserves the firing squad 5 times, 4 shots and then the fifth while they stand over him as he is dying and shoot him in the face one more time...just like what he did to Dolezsar....

********************

ATTENTION: This is NOT A FORUM FOR BASHING DEE MOWER or to go over anything concerning Novak. THE SHOOTER IS SENTANCED AND CONVICTED, JUSTICE IS SERVED!!!.....I am deleting any comments that do not follow these guidelines.

Those of you that want to sit in your living rooms and read the newspapers and armchair quarterback what happened in the courtroom do not have all the facts. PERIOD. The defense took 2.5 years to bring information and other parties to court, they did not, this was not a case of circumstansial evidence, this was a case of solid evidence and it took a jury of his peers a few mere HOURS to convict wright. ENOUGH SAID...

I REPEAT, this is not a forum to discuss your vain imaginings, you weren't in the courtroom, you don't know.

beyonce HIT single ladies - 7yr old dance sensations! yak films

2010-05-15T16:10:00.000-07:00

Wow! these girls can dance! The turns are fabulous, the choreography amazing, the fact that these young girls remember this choreography truly amazing! I just love watching these girls dance!

I am amazed at the outpouring of disdain for this dance! My oldest daughter danced in outfits like this when she was 7, she is now almost 30! I don't remember people telling me that I was raising a slut or a pole dancer! Who are these people that have these negative comments? Hove they never been to an NBA, NFL, or college basketball or football game? These types of dances are performed at every half time, by girls that have the boobs TO shake around! No one is complaining about the older girls dancing and wearing these costumes, so why shouldn't younger girls wear them?

Some say that these girls are too young to dance and wear these costumes. Why? Some say it is sexual and erotic, some even say that it is pornographic. So if it isn't all those things to 20 yr old girls why is it for 7 yr old girls?

I have a daughter who dances Latin dance on the professional-amateur level. Many are uncomfortable with her moves, which are suggestive and erotic, they are supposed to be suggestive and erotic. If you are uncomfortable, you need to ask yourself why and NOT blame the dancer! Many styles of Latin dance are supposed to mimic lovemaking, lots of 7 yr old girls are learning to dance these dances too. Is that wrong? NO!

Isn't part of this thinking the same kind of thinking that says that a young woman wearing a short skirt was 'asking for it', after being assaulted?

May 1st, 2010. A great day. Justice is served for Ken Dolezsar

2010-05-13T21:56:00.000-07:00

May 1^st, 2010. A great day. Justice is served. There is still one big question, why did he kill Ken? I knew Ken, did business nearly every day with Ken for 5 years especially during the time he supposedly had business dealings with wright (no punctuation because he doesn’t deserve it). Ken was not the man that wright’s lawyer said that he was.

wright and his lawyer are Rude and Despicable, but who cares now, the prosecution had TONS of evidence against wright and now JUSTICE is served.

Though justice won’t bring him back, justice doesn’t make life alright in his absence. So many things have changed because of Ken’s death, so many things are gone……in every news story picture that was showed (it appeared to all be the same one) there was a hand on Ken’s shoulder; that was Matt’s. He loves and misses Ken so much……..We all miss you Ken……..

Here is a reverse chronology of the Salt Lake Tribunes’ account of the trial:

May 1, 2010 -- http://www.sltrib.com/ci_14992782?IADID=Search-www.sltrib.com-www.sltrib.com

April, 29 , 2010 - http://www.sltrib.com/ci_14984665?IADID=Search-www.sltrib.com-www.sltrib.com

April 29, 2010 -- http://www.sltrib.com/ci_14976562?IADID=Search-www.sltrib.com-www.sltrib.com

April 22, 2010 -- http://www.sltrib.com/ci_14937858?IADID=Search-www.sltrib.com-www.sltrib.com

April 22, 2010 -- http://www.sltrib.com/ci_14932508?IADID=Search-www.sltrib.com-www.sltrib.com

April 20, 2010 -- http://www.sltrib.com/ci_14921399?IADID=Search-www.sltrib.com-www.sltrib.com

April 19, 2010 - - http://www.sltrib.com/ci_14914811?IADID=Search-www.sltrib.com-www.sltrib.com

April 16, 2010 - http://www.sltrib.com/ci_14901323?IADID=Search-www.sltrib.com-www.sltrib.com

April 14, 2010 - http://www.sltrib.com/ci_14885013?IADID=Search-www.sltrib.com-www.sltrib.com

Jan 29, 2010 - http://www.sltrib.com/ci_14299011?IADID=Search-www.sltrib.com-www.sltrib.com

Jan 28, 2010 - http://www.sltrib.com/ci_14288947?IADID=Search-www.sltrib.com-www.sltrib.com

Dec 23, 2009 - http://www.sltrib.com/ci_14058212?IADID=Search-www.sltrib.com-www.sltrib.com

RIP Bill Moyseyuk, RIP Grandpa Bill, Rest In Peace…….

2010-03-31T12:36:00.000-07:00

I loved Jason Lindner before I met him. I had sourced him the fall of 06 and watched his stats through the season, with each game and a good showing I would cheer and when he had the inevitable crappy game, I was heartsick for him. Right after Christmas I told Bo that something must have happened as he wasn’t playing, a few weeks later Bo contacted him to find out that Jason had suffered a severe injury. Jason was the consummate player as he told Bo that “I am ok with the backup goalie playing, he is good and I am not ready, what is most important is, who is the best goalie for the team.” I was never more impressed with a young man’s attitude, and have never been more impressed with anyone else’s.

I first met Grandpa Bill when he came down with Jason and his Family in April of 2007. I have never met a grandpa that loved, nor was more proud of, a grandson more than Grandpa Bill. He came with a folder of pictures, articles and memorabilia of Jason and would share it with anyone who would listen and look. We looked, we listened and we fell in love with Grandpa Bill. Bo especially loved his stories of how hockey used to be. Bo and grandpa Bill forged a friendship that was strong and true and built on a mutual love of hockey and of course, Jason Lindner.

Grandpa Bill not only became a great fan of UVSC/UVU hockey, but a fan of Matt Beaudry, Head Coach as well. Bill was supportive and helpful not only to Matt, but gave his friendship willingly and spontaneously to General Manager Lisa Beaudry. He was kind, helpful and ever ready to give advice. He supported us when others abandoned us, he was there and rejoiced with us when we were proven to be honest and upfront in our dealings during our time with the hockey team.

Bill Moyseyuk, professional hockey player, professional hockey scout, devoted hockey fan, devoted grandpa and devoted friend. I will miss him like crazy.

Winter's Itinerary in India............

2010-03-01T21:43:00.001-08:00

February 26 leave slc , fly to chicago, fly to new delhi
Feb 27 arrive new delhi 9.30 PM
Feb 28- new delhi
*red fort, jama majid, karims, nizamiuddin shrine, wedding market, old delhi tour/spice market

mar 1- agra, jaipur, vrindavan
*taj mahal, city of widows

Mar 2- jaipur
*ajmer fort, kerala massage, monkey temple, bollywood movie, court astrolger

Mar 3, 4 - bikaner
*karni mata rat temple, camel trek - camping in desert

Mar 5,6,7- jodhpur
*mehangarah fort, meheranis textiles, maharajas uncle, bishnoi village tour, dance and cooking lessons, service

Mar 8- train to haridwar/rishikesh- 23 hours

Mar 9,10,11, 12- rishikesh
*kumbh mela festival, rajiji tiger safari, yoga, village visits, rafting on Ganges, service

Mar 13-train to new delhi- fly to goa

Mar 13,14,15,16- goa
*goa beaches, fisherman, visit to old Goa, cathedral visit

Mar 17,18, new delhi
*ghandi museum, street kids volunteering, final shopping trip

Mar 19- fly home

BABYGURL

2010-02-27T16:15:00.000-08:00

Our family's babygurl is Winter.

We only treated her like a babygirl when she was little.

At about 9 years of age, maybe 10, she began to be a lifeline in our family.

She is so accomplished, responsible and well, just plain gorgeous. Winter has been Tuffy's little momma, she has been his anchor as I worked hard to manage the hockey team, and then navigate attending college. Neither Tuff nor I, nor her poppa could have done any of this without her!

Yesterday at 11am, Winter left with her high school for a 3 week long humanitarian trip to India. All of us are in culture shock. We miss her immensely.

I must say that Winter had so much help pulling this trip all together. She worked all summer 2009 and made nearly a thousand dollars for her trip. Family and friends helped too; Sara, Grandma Betty & Grandpa Steve, Uncle Jim & Aunt Pleasant, Dee, the Teeters and Pat.

How can I begin to thank everyone for their love and support.

Winter will learn so much, she will gain so much insight, she will be a different person because of this opportunity and experience.

I dropped her off and I just stood there, I didn't know what to do. I wanted to go with her, I wanted to talk with her! The only thing that I was able to do was hold onto Kathryn LeBaron whose boys go to Walden School of Liberal Arts and are going on the trip and walked in with Winter.

Next time though, I will definitely make her take her phone, at least a text that says, we are off and ok, that would have helped me let go better.

But now she is gone and the only thing I can do is wait, wait to hear from her, wait to read her comments and wait until she gets home.

She has started her own blog, as this is the first of her BIG adventures, feel free to drop in and leave her a comment! The World with Winter. Enjoy!

Abby Sunderland and her dream.....

2010-02-27T16:10:00.000-08:00

Abby's Blog

It has been a dream of Abby Sunderland since she was 13 years old and began single-handing, to one day sail solo around the world.

She is 16 years old and her blog contains the story of her attempt to become the world's youngest solo circumnavigator. Visit her official website at Abby Sunderland and her blog at Abby's Blog.

She reminds me of our Winter, so cool headed, so responsible, so accomplished. I want to share Abby with you. Enjoy!

"BAD REPORT"

2010-01-31T17:41:00.000-08:00

I made an enemy today, I am sure of it.

I was looking for some info on a totally unrelated topic and found this blog posting: 'Bad Report'.

A little boy comes home from school with a 'bad report' (see picture, I LOATHE all the frowny faces!!!)(names deleted)

For the life of me I could not fathom why a mom would take a picture of her kid's bad report and post it on the internet.

Poor kid! He probably felt awful already, he is obviously not enjoying school and he comes home and mom takes a picture of his 'Bad Report'.

Hmmmm imagine if my husband came home and I had a bad report and he took a picture of the messy house or the wrecked car or any other number of things that I am not doing well enough and imagine my shame if he posted them on the internet?

Here is what I posted to this mom's blog entry, I know it wasn't any of my business, but that brings up a good point; whose business is it when you post it on the internet?

I wrote, "Maybe he isn't interested in writing to the kid in Spain and most definitely not interested in 'basketball' spelling. Crap, I wouldn't be either! As an adult none of us like doing stupid stuff, why do schools expect our kids to be interested in stupid stuff...hey maybe not all 25-30 kids like all the same stuff at all the same time...maybe he just needs a break and would learn and grow at a great pace if he could focus on the really great things he enjoys....sorry, imho, that is how I see it..."

I have never believed in being disrespectful to a child, I just don't feel that it is the right, righteous, honorable or good thing to do. I try very hard and most times am successful at treating my kids that way I would want to be treated.

That is one reason why my kids are in a charter school. No frowny faces from my kids teachers! The Montessori concept of teaching children is respectful of the child. Montessori methods encourage learning in a child and foster a high level of self esteem.

I didn't wake up today to make an enemy, I don't want to make one, but I do know this....a child should be respected and most importantly, NEVER shamed.

Clan Beaudry New Years Eve 2009 Top 10

2010-01-01T23:55:00.000-08:00

#10 -Lisa received a 4.0 gpa for the fall 2009 semester. Lisa is a Junior now, on track to graduate in Spring of 2011 with a BS, Integrated Studies with Emphases in Business and Communication. She starts an Internship with the 'Office of the Mayor of Salt Lake City' the first of January.

#9 -On a cold and terrible day in December, Winter got her Learner's Permit. Clear the ditches! She'll probably use them!

#8 -The entire Clan; Lisa & Bo with Winter n Tuffy n Tuff's summer bro, Bailey, Sara, Abby & Jake with Paul, Nona n Beau, Owen & Emily and Hope & Trey went to the Clan fave cabin at Bear Lake in Utah. We grilled, slept, swam everyday with LOADS of sunscreen, hiked and played games. We bonded and loved and had a great time!

#7 -Lisa & Bo went back to where it all began in Indy! The entire Clan came except for the Wilson portion. Even Grandma Betty was there and Grandpa Steve showed up! What a great time, racing and dining and laughing and loving! Trey brought the best gift and the best surprise, an engagement ring for Hope, which she promptly tried to throw off the balcony! (Ask Hope to explain this!)

#6 -Lisa, with all the gnashing of teeth, wailing and sobbing she could muster, turned 50 yrs old. Unfortunately, few noticed.

#5 -Bo was promoted to the rank of Captain in the Provo City Fire Department in April. The whole Clan was there to support him at his 'got sworn at' ceremony. (Bo needs to explain this)

#4 -Owen graduated from the Utah Fire Rescue Academy; Recruit Fire Academy on Dec 16 as a Firefighter I & Firefighter II and EMT. We think Bo is more excited than Owen is. To accomplish such a feat, Owen and his adorable girlfriend Emily and their super-chew dog, Ivy, moved into the Clan house in August. Everyone loves having them at home.

#3 -Hope graduated from the Walden School of Liberal Arts High School with a year of college on the books. Huge celebration and even huger sighs of relief from all.

#2 -Hope & Trey were married in an elegant and beautiful peacock inspired ceremony in October. Entire Clan was in attendance including Grandma Betty, Aunt Carole and Uncle Jim. What a great week! We LOVE Trey, he is a fantastic new son for our family!

#1 -Bo and Lisa celebrated 30 years of marriage on December 7. Bo was over heard to say, "Don't know whether to give her an anniversary or a sympathy card. I think she's pretty cool tho...".

2009-11-15T15:38:00.000-08:00

Decimation; to almost destroy something; to inflict so much damage on something that it is reduced in effectiveness…

Ken Dolezsar – you were full of life. You came into our lives and took us on an incredible journey that none of us could have gone on without each other. You loved us and we loved you! You taught me about marketing, sales, managing, working in a team and about exuberance for a project.

Most importantly, you were my friend. You were my husband’s friend and how can I convey, how much you are missed.

The tragedy of your death is combined in my heart with the tragedy of the decimation of the team. The UVU Hockey team was a creative effort, like a child, that You, Matt, myself and Sara created. No one person was more than the other, the 4 of us, were integral to the effort….we all enjoyed the Hades out of what we were doing….weekend night brought smiles and excitement! Weekend nights always brought a big hug from you, you ALWAYS commented on how my perfume smelled so nice.

My life will never be the same, my husband’s life will never be the same….we miss you Ken, we loved you and always will. May your murderer continue to rot in prison and subsequently roast in hell. Matt will be sitting at his trial in January.

TRIAL OF man who is accused of killing Ken Dolezsar UPDATE: the trial was scheduled to start several weeks ago, it is now continued for several months. I will post again as soon as I know a better time frame.

UPDATE: It appears that the trial will begin on April 19th, 2010 and expected to last until May 7th.

I turn 50 in a few days………..

2009-10-20T10:50:00.000-07:00

Makes me sad, makes me cry…..so much of my life is gone, so much of my life is over…..my childhood, where did it go?

So many songs and so many song writers, Marie has issues, Michael is dead.

Forgive me for crying, forgive me for being sad, but I remember lazy days of teen-age years; laying on the bed, listening to songs, listening to Michael, dancing to Michael, dreaming, laughing, dancing and planning….Where did all that go? Where did my life go?

The Top 10 Michael Jackson Songs of the '70s

1. "Who's Loving You" (1969)
2. "The Love You Save" (1970)
3. "Never Can Say Goodbye" (1971)
4. "Ben" (1972)
5. "Get It Together" (1973)
6. "Shake Your Body (Down To The Ground)" (1978)
7. "That's What You Get (For Being Polite)" (1978)
8. "She's Out Of My Life" (1979)
9. "This Place Hotel" (1980)
10. "Can You Feel It" (1980)

Not only was I naked, I didn’t have my debit card.

2009-10-11T18:38:00.000-07:00

My husband comes home from work at 7am after a 48 hour shift. I never sleep well when he is gone.

When my hubby comes home, if we don’t need to be anywhere and if we can stay in bed, I usually (within 60 minutes or so of him coming home) get the most satisfying and deepest sleep…. that kind of mind refreshing, body lead-heavy, mouth open, drooling kind of sleep that you can get.

This morning was no different…..ahhh such bliss.

Though, there was one difference this morning…..my sleep was filled with outrageous dreams. I am going to tell you my favorite.

==I needed something from the store so I get in my car. Just a few blocks from my house, at a stop light, I realize I am naked. I look around to see if anyone can see me. I see a guy standing on the corner waiting to cross the street , he has noticed. He gives me a big grin and then a ‘thumbs up’! Then he starts a strip tease dance! Mortified, I put my car in reverse and slowly inch back behind the cars next to me so he can’t see me. Does any of this humiliation cause me to turn around and go home to get clothes? Nah, dreams really like to humiliate us, so I continue on my way.

I get to the store and find a side entrance. So I sneak in and start ‘sneaking’ around the aisles looking for clothes I can put on. I now realize that, of course I don’t have my debit card, I am naked. A girl clerk comes over and for some reason I thought she would understand my predicament. I get a non committal shrug from her; she doesn’t seem to care about anything I am doing. As I continue to sneak around the store to find something, a t-shirt and some kind of pants, anything. I come across loads and loads of costumes with ruffles and feathers. Wouldn’t that be better than being naked, not in my mind, I’ve got standards!

….so I continue looking and blissfully my dream fades away as I am awakened by a husband who wants to make pancakes, bacon and eggs…so my dream had a happy ending anyway.

Deciphering...

My husband says this is the classic dream of not feeling prepared….I say to him, I was born unprepared, and am rushing through my life unprepared.

My husband says the people and the places and things all represent something…at this time I figure that he is the man at the stoplight, as he is always supporting me and giving me the ‘thumbs up’, even on the dumbest of my ideas, his ‘striptease dance’ is his way of always being right there by my side and enjoying everything!

I figure my kids are the store clerk, “yeah whatever”, they say to whatever dumb thing I am doing. They are a pretty confidant bunch, so whatever dumb mistakes I am making, they don’t feel threatened by it!

Well, moral of story, at least I know:

I have a loving supportive husband; he’d rather be doing a strip tease dance on the corner than desert me.
I have dress standards; rather be naked than ruffles.
I have well-adjusted and confident kids/they don’t care if their mom is an idiot.

I have a phobia about taking family pictures!

2009-09-30T10:50:00.000-07:00

I have a phobia about taking family pictures. I hate to take one without my children's partners, yet the only one that I have ever done that included the partners, the couples that weren't bound by marriage, each and everyone broke up within a month!

So now, I just hate to do take them! I love all my childrens' partners and I want to include them, but I am terrified that they will break up if I include them....

And....I hate to take a picture and look at them and say "sorry, you can't be included as you aren't part of our family"!!! How rude! Actually they are very much a part of our family, but if I include them, they will break up!!!!!

sooooooooooooooo...this above pic was taken on Matt's B-day, June 4, 2009. It wasn't posed or orchestrated, but when I got it off the camera, I realized that it had our 6 children and Abby's 3 children. It's our Beaudry Blood and that is what we call it.

It is a fun pic and just happened this way. It is prob our one and only pic that we will ever have this way.... I will enjoy it and everyone KNOWS that I didn't make it this way!

It was an accident!

True Companion............

2009-09-17T12:36:00.000-07:00

On our ihome, Bo and I have a playlist that wakes us up. I found this song not too long ago...

I LOVE this song!

HERE is a LIVE guitar version by Marc Cohn

I think of me n Bo and I think of Trey n Hope, Abby n Jake .....I think of all the people that love each other and are or have gotten married and I Just....well, I LOVE this song...

Lyrics to Marc Cohn's True Companion:
Baby I've been searching like everybody else
Can't say nothing different about myself
Sometimes I'm an angel
And sometimes I'm cruel
And when it comes to love
I'm just another fool
Yes, I'll climb a mountain
I'm gonna swim the sea
There ain't no act of God girl
Could keep you safe from me
My arms are reaching out
Out across this canyon
I'm asking you to be my true companion
True companion
True companion

So don't you dare and try to walk away
I've got my heart set on our wedding day
I've got this vision of a girl in white
Made my decision that it's you allright
And when I take your hand
I'll watch my heart set sail
I'll take my trembling fingers
And I'll lift up your veil
Then I'll take you home
And with wild abandon
Make love to you just like a true companion
You are my true companion
I got a true companion
True companion

When the years have done irreparable harm
I can see us walking slowly arm in arm
Just like the couple on the corner do
'Cause girl I will always be in love with you
And when I look in your eyes
I'll still see that spark
Until the shadows fall
Until the room grows dark
Then when I leave this Earth
I'll be with the angels standin'
I'll be out there waiting for my true companion
Just for my true companion
True companion
True companion

My husband is a firefighter

2009-09-11T07:39:00.001-07:00

In 1993, my husband was in the job search market, he had a job he loved in a field he was good at. The down-sizing of the early 90's, left him with an awesome severance package and 6 months to find a new job.

It was during this 6 months that he told me he wanted to become a firefighter.

My husband graduated from the City of Denver Fire Department Academy in May of 1994.

After some time, Matt was hired by the city of Walla Walla Fire Department.

It was while he was working for Walla Walla that I got a call from him early one morning to turn on the TV. A plane had crashed into one of the twin towers of the World Trade Center.

As the morning unfolded horrifically, I remember each and every minute, where I was and what I was doing. As the day moved into night, and the realization that firefighters just like my husband, had kissed their wives, hugged their kids and gone to work that morning, just like so many other mornings.......were now never coming home. I was overcome with a grief that to this day has never left me. 343 New York City Fire Department firefighters lost their lives that day.

My husband says that he is there for people on one of the worst days of their lives. My husband and his fellow firefighters walk straight into trouble, while helping others away from it.
It is a sad day when anyone whose life and occupation are committed to helping others is harmed in that dedication. 9-11 is such a very sad day.

May we never forget those who died, may we never forget those who planned and orchestrated such horror.

May we bring them to justice for their crimes.

Groovy Kind of Love

2009-09-04T23:17:00.000-07:00

Ann and Bill Tillman; 2 people that were close and loving friends of ours in Colorado. Bill and Ann were always there for us. Devout fundamental Christians, they tried hard to be accepting of our LDS devotion, going so far as to tell Bo that they were concerned for us, but they loved us all the same. No we didn’t believe exactly as they did and they felt we were wrong, but they always loved us and helped us and were right there for us in so many ways.

Ann & Bill and their family On Father's Day 2009

Their kids were our kid’s friends. We had dinner at their house more times than I can count. We all had little farms with chickens, goats, pigs, cows, large gardens, etc. We all worked hard and fended for ourselves as much as possible. Bill was a plumber and a very good one. He had his own plumbing company and took care of many plumbing problems on the eastern prairie of Colorado.

I remember the summer that the prairie was on fire all summer long and Bo was out almost daily fighting grass fires. Some of those grass fires could reach 20 feet in the air! The way the flames raced over the prairie and jumped over the roads made me more afraid and more in awe at the same time, than any other thing I have ever seen! The night that the fires spread towards Ann & Bill’s house, Bo was in the black fighting it, but I was there with my kids and hers and we had hoses on the yards and the barns. I wound up taking all of our kids to safety as Ann & Bill stayed and defended their home. Late into the night, the good fight was won and all was well……

After we moved away from Colorado we lost track of Ann & Bill Tillman and their awesome kids….that is easy to do back in the late 90’s. There was no MySpace or Facebook utilities to ‘keep us connected with the people around us’.

About 5 years ago, we had heard that Bill had been in a horrific car wreck and was paralyzed from the neck down, a spinal fracture, Christopher Reeves type. So awful, my veins ran like ice to think of it. The new responsibilities of Ann, Bill’s wife. How their life had changed overnight.

About 8 months ago we all found each other on Facebook. We saw Bill in a wheelchair with a tube to his throat to breath. I can’t fathom it. I just can’t. He was once so vibrant, strong and healthy. I remember once our well froze up and Bill and Bo crawled down into the deep well hole and were warming and working down there. Bill was athletic and agile. Now, he can’t breathe on his own.

He can type though, at least I think, as we get can correspond with him on Facebook. My most favorite posting of his is in response to Bo’s status which read: Coach Matt Beaudry “is a gnarly bad @ss!” To which Bill replied, “Bring It!”

As a wife married to a man that I adore 95% of the time, I know Ann to be the same. Actually she adores Bill 100% of the time. I cannot imagine what her life is like, or rather I try to and I just nearly dissolve into a fit of depression.

I don’t think Bill can hold her, make love to her, or many of the wonderful things that a man and woman do together. My heart breaks.

Not too long ago, in June I think it was, Ann posted this status: Ann Tillman: THE BEST LOVE SONG OF ALL TIME….PHIL COLLINS “GROOVY KIND OF LOVE”. Just went on a walk with the dog & was listening to Phil on the ipod. Love it.”

Every time I hear this song now I think of Ann & Bill. My heart is broken and yet lifts at the same time, I sob and I laugh.

I know that their strong faith in God sustains them. Ann says, “Enjoy God’s beauty in each day.” And my favorite, “You do what you can, & you let God do what you can’t.”

Ann & Bill, you inspire me. Love you…………

Ken Dolezsar

2009-08-19T22:54:00.000-07:00

Tonight we talked about Ken, today we cried about Ken.

It has been a long hard struggle. After Ken was killed, 2 dads of players on the hockey team made accusations about Matt and I that caused UVU to fire us on the spot.

UVU didn't even ask us about the accusations, they didn't want to hear our response at all.

We were heart broken, still are. The team we built with Ken and worked alongside of with him was broken beyond repair, we could not save it. Ken was disconsolate I am sure and so were and are we.

If Ken were still live, no man would have dared to even try to wrench control of the hockey team from him nor us.

If Ken were still alive Matt and I would still be working hard running and coaching the hockey team. The team would have continued onto great things, instead of the ridiculous sorry state it is today.

If Ken were still alive I would not be having to sue UVU to get paid.

If Ken were still alive Matt and I would not be suing two men that we once thought were friends, whom we had meals with and shared ours and theirs homes with.

UVU did a full 3 year audit of every single penny that went through mine and Matt's hands, they found no embezzling, no inappropriate use of funds, etc....

Everything in ruins, everything we worked so hard for gone.....

Ken would have made all the difference, but for some reason a guy took a gun and shot him.

Matt and I worked with Ken every day for nearly 5 years.

Ken a millionaire sat on my white-dog-hairy couch and never minded, he just wanted to talk hockey and be with Matt and sometimes me.....

Oh if I could reverse the wheels of time.....

On Sept 22nd 2009, the trial starts, My husband will be there for every day he can, his best friend, his best dear, dear friend was cruelly taken from him....

Ken was taken from this world way too soon......

UPDATE on Ken's killer's trail; Ken's family says it now has been postponed until Jan 22nd, 2010.

UPDATE: NOW - It appears that the trial will begin on April 19th, 2010 and expected to last until May 7th.

Marking one’s own body.

2009-08-03T00:59:00.000-07:00

Many, many people feel that bodies are for decorating. We tan them, design our hair, apply make-up and even make more permanent markings.

My husband got a tattoo in June. Owen designed it. My hubby thought and pondered over this permanent marking on his body. The impetus for such a permanent marking? His best friend was brutally murdered, and shortly there-after, the business that he and his best friend had created and ran together was destroyed by people bent on revenge and jealousy. He was devastated by the turn of events, but he kept hearing his best friends voice in his mind guiding him and being there for him. His best friend was the true ‘measure of a man’.

“”"The measure of a man's life is in how well he strives to overcome his personal problems. Neither his temporary failures nor life’s unfair reversals or tragedies, and especially not his death, however untimely it seems, negates the value of his personal triumphs. They will go on forever - for him, for those who love him, and for all who follow after."
---Yorgason and Yorgason””

This picture was taken just in July 2009, on a very sweet family vacation. It was the happiest I have seen him in a long time.

Ken meant the world to my husband and hence, the major symbol of the design is a compass. The rest of the symbols you will have to ask him about……..

What a Week!

2009-06-18T20:11:00.001-07:00

Going back to Indy was so many things.....

I loved all the racing we watched and I LOVED sharing the racing with my kids and Bo.

Trey proposed to Hope while we were there...very romantic!

I adored all the time with my kids!

When we were on the airplane, it was just me and Tuff and Bo. That was so sweet!

Bo and I totally reconnected with Tuff. I love that boy, well both of them!

For most of the week, Owen and Emily shared a bed in the same room as Bo and I. It seems that between Hope n Trey and Owen n Emily, everyone was getting their lovins in except for Bo and I! Very sad for us!

Though on a sadder note, going back home made me realize all the reasons we left there, namely my husband hated it there. He was like a fox in a trap, he literally chewed his foot off to get out of there. He got very quiet and sad in Indy too. He told me that he was sad about realizing what we would have become had we stayed there. I never got a chance to ask him all the details, but I gathered he was still happy that we didn't live there anymore.

We saw our old house, what a treat, the place looks good, but there was no nostalgia for me....none for Bo either. We enjoy the life we have created and do not miss what might have been back in Indiana.

The only thing that I truly miss in Indy is my family..Mark n Paula, Monica, Niko, Ryan, Jason, Dean n Karen, Morgan, Curtis, Shirley n Sonny, Laura and her family. I will have to post about my lunch with my life long friend.

I cherish the time we had there and I enjoyed every minute of our trip...

Though...I miss my kids now as we all came home and they scattered. Time to have a Sunday BBQ I guess! Just in time for Father's-day!

This is it....

2009-05-13T08:21:00.000-07:00

In just a few short days I will stand in front of my childhood home, a home of many memories....
(be sure that you click on the picture of the house and look around)

For my family now, this home was the place where I met my handsome hubby, where I first kissed him, where we first made love.... ( oh yeah...)

I cut his hair (my first time) in the upstairs bathroom.

I brought our brand new baby girl, Sara, here to live when she was a week old. Abby was conceived and joined us in this house almost 4 years later.

Bo and I lived here for nearly 5 years....we learned about each other, we learned how to be married and how to be parents.

Sometimes it wasn't easy, but it was fun! Still is....

Love Struggle: Paintings by John Gwinn, shown is titled, 'The Beginning'

I love my boys.....

2009-04-18T10:55:00.001-07:00

Try JibJab Sendables® eCards today!

Such a great day!

2009-04-02T23:29:00.000-07:00

Such a great day!

When I decided to start snowboarding:
· I was worried that I was too overweight.
· I was worried that I would be laughed at.
· I was worried that I wouldn’t be able to do it.
· I as worried that I would get hurt.
· I was worried that it would be too hard.
· I was worried that if I didn’t learn to snowboard that I would spend another year dropping my kids off at the mountain and driving away in tears. I knew that I was missing out on something special.

I had two goals for snowboarding:

· Being on the mountain with my kids.
· Getting exercise.

I accomplished both of these. Last Friday (March 28th) we went to Park City. What a great day for me snowboarding! Look at my pictures! I met my goals! I am on the mountain with my kids, we are laughing and having a great time.

**A special treat is what has happened between me and my handsome hubby, we have had a great time on the mountain together. We laugh, we kiss, we even had a little fight (he made up pretty good).

Such a great day!

I finally learned to link my turns at the end of the day. I as so tired that I would have to stop half-way down the mountain to rest. I was so bummed at the end of my final run! I wanted to do more, I had finally started ‘getting it”. I was just too tired to keep going. As it was I could hardly walk to the car, I could hardly get out of the car after the ride home and I hobbled around on sore legs for several days afterwards.

All in all, it was SUCH A GREAT DAY!

I FINALLY DID IT!!! I rode the lift!

2009-04-02T22:39:00.000-07:00

ok, so it took my family getting me to go to Park City to snowboard to finally get me on a lift.....

story goes: I was scared to death to ride the lift. Not sure why, maybe of falling, maybe of getting smooshed under it like Hope did once, but I was scared to death to do it.

But, we knew we were going to the UVU Rodeo Team Rodeo in Heber on Friday Night (3/28/2009) and it was Sara who said, “Let’s go to Park City snowboarding Friday day since I have to work up there all day anyway and then we can change and go to the rodeo after. I said ok! I was a little worried though, “what about riding the lift?” “Piece of cake!” they all said. It was all of them too, a huge family outing was planned to Park City for that Friday, newly hired Park City Snowboard Certified Instructor Owen, Sara (who was also there taking care of her ski racers for Westminster), Winter, Tuff, Matt Guthrie (foster son), me and Bo.

Here is a video of me riding the lift for the first time in 25 years with a snowboard on my feet. Do you see the panic and fear in my face?

Now watch as I fall off the lift at the end of the ride.... lol!

Snowboard Sunday

2009-02-09T00:52:00.000-08:00

Here is a video as am swamped with school work, I will edit and review later, but just so that you know that I am actually attempting this: here goes.

A confident man creates the feeling of trust with a woman.

2009-01-26T07:25:00.001-08:00

A woman will feel emotionally safe with a man who is emotionally available, honest, trustworthy and authentic. These are emotional character strengths she can respect and admire in a man.

A man of character and emotional depth is a man who knows who he is and likes himself. His love for himself is so strong he does not need to gain the acceptance of others by trying to be something he is not.

His strength is not physical so much as it is in the clarity of his mind and emotions. These are character strengths that a woman not only admires, but feels safe with. He is not a weak man that will bend to the whims of other people.

She can trust him to be who he is. This kind of man is described as being in his emotional integrity. --- Gary van Warmerdam

FORTUNE COOKIE FRIDAY - 'You find beauty in ordinary things. Do not lose this ablity.'

2009-01-25T00:23:00.000-08:00

In the winter I am always overcome with the way the sun comes over the mountains. I have said this many times, "look at the way the sun comes over the mountains." This is of great amusement to my kids for some reason.

I am not talking about a sunrise where I am standing in front of the mountains, I drive in the shade of the mountains, going north or going south. I see the mountains with the sun coming over me. I see it from the bottom of the sunrise.

There is so much beauty and hope in the way that the sun comes over the mountains. There are these rays of light from the east that come first horizontal and then they start to slant down.

It is so pretty, there is always snow and many times the sky is beginning to be bright blue.

I know that I will never lose my ability to find beauty in this ordinary thing.

That was fun!!! Here we go again....

2009-01-01T10:05:00.000-08:00

Photo Tagging.....I had so much fun on the last one I am going to double the fun....eighth photo folder - eighth photo - tell about it.....

Bo n Tuff, that is the title. My husband Bo, who I am absolutely crazy about or because of, not sure which, any given day it changes....and Tuff.

Bo is working at Provo Fire Department Station 3. That is where the training tower is. I had taken Tuffy to visit his poppa and we climbed up into the top of the training tower, that is about 4 stories high. I had my camera with me and took some really nice pictures of the two of them.

Have you ever known a boy who was completely simbiotic with his father? This little boy is, he thrives in his father's presence.

Tuffy has had no easy life and somedays things are hard. I have to say that there has never been a more patient father than my husband with his little Tuff-man. Bo/Matt has always been that way with the little ones, but for Tuffy he found extra.

This picture was taken, well my computer says; Tuesday, July 27, 2004, 9:47:18 PM and that is probably exactly right.

I am tagging Matthew Garner and Jen Atkinson, whom I got this idea from. BTW Jen, I was deeply touched by your comments about your 4/4 photo tag....

Photo Tag

2009-01-01T09:38:00.000-08:00

Tagging....multiple meanings, this is a fun one....go to your photo files, go to the fourth folder, fourth picture and tell about it:

Abby's baby shower w/Paul at her in-laws, the Wilson's in Ogden. This would have been June I think, maybe July of 2004.

Great day, I love how Tuff is sitting on the arm of the chair with his face all scraped up.

I tag Sara, Abby, Zannah and Angie...

My kids have spoken....

2009-01-01T09:29:00.000-08:00

Well...... my kids have decided that I need to post another post...I resisted saying that my last post, "when a man is mean ot his woman" was a very special post to me. I felt it was my most creative yet and very beautiful. Sara responds with, "yeah in a Schindler's List kind of way". So more posts coming.......

When a man is mean to his woman...

2008-10-03T14:11:00.000-07:00

When a man is mean to his woman;

he destroys a very part of her soul that is everything tender.

He replaces tenderness with fear and mistrust. No matter how hard he works at it later, it takes repeated amounts of energy on his part to fix that kind of damage.

When a man is mean to his woman; she stops feeling pretty and wanted, she starts feeling unwanted and even ugly. Even if she is a pretty confident person, the meanness robs her of her equilibrium and shakes her to her very core. She has to work double time to get back on her feet.

Each and every woman has a gentle core, a soft underbelly.

She wants to forgive and move on, yet when she forgives someone who is mean to her, she fears. If she forgives her man more then once for being mean, she starts to doubt herself and then begins to shut off this delicate gentle tender core.

Everyone suffers when a woman shuts down her tenderness, there is no tragedy greater then a woman with no tenderness…………….second only to the tragedy that a man caused it.

The sadness on a woman’s face makes us all want to cry. I am overcome with the sadness in the faces of these women.

2008-09-20T16:16:00.000-07:00

Sooooo….my husband gets this magazine that he just loves, Best Life -What Matters to Men.

I saw it sitting on the dining room table and I leafed through the pages and saw this article by author Anne Trubek. Fully Bonded – Improve intimacy so that your marriage can survive the long haul.

Here we have Clinical Psychologist and Certified Sex Therapist, David Schnarch, PhD, ( I am not sure if I want to trust a sex therapist, certified ot otherwise, whose last name is ‘Schnarch”). Schnarch is the author of Sex, Love and Intimacy in Emotionally Committed Relationships. Schnarch says, “Eye contact is absolutely essential to maintaining intimacy in a relationship, even during sex.”

What??? I am too busy with my eyes slammed shut to be looking at him! I’ll admit that sometimes I take a peek at my husband during this, the most intimate of times, and maybe once or twice in a about 30 years have we ever made any type of prolonged eye contact during, uh, you know, the ‘hippity dippity’. I don’t know about you, but, I am just not so sure.

Do you have to have an intimate gaze at that time? I mean, do real live people even look at each other, or is it just me that is so busy enjoying myself that I don’t like to open my eyes as I can see the messy bedroom, the picture of the kids, the dog looking at me (no I am kidding, LOL) etc…. How about you? Do you have eye contact during sex?

Here are other ways to improve intimacy according to Trubek;

Lock Lips, kissing releases oxytocin which in return decreases stress and makes us feel bonded.

Make Small Connections, everyday we have the opportunity to do small things that show that we care, cuddling, calling during the day and being happy to see each other with a kiss or more when you greet each other.

Open your Eyes, again Snarch says, “Eye contact usually denotes connection and sex without eye contact and the lights on (regularly?) limits your intimacy.

Fight it Out, Conflict creates passion. The absence of fighting is NOT intimacy. When you vent your frustration make sure that you are planning something afterwards that will produce endorphins and help you reconnect. My advice to this is to make sure that you fight fair! No put downs and no rudeness. Don’t say something that you would not want said to you. (easier said than done I know)

the pain is great sometimes.....

2008-09-18T23:13:00.000-07:00

I cant bear to go to the doors, because when I leave I am forced to look….I am forced as a moth to the flame…are his scratchings still there? His joy and his pride still evident in the rock? I cant bear it. I am overcome with a grief still that is debilitating at times.

Tuffy’s first words, were ‘UVSC HOCKEY’ scratched in that rock as he waited for me to finish in a meeting, at the student center, he was so proud and I always look and my heart breaks. It was what he knew. He loved to be a part of it and he was as proud as his momma and poppa were. It is all over now and he doesn’t understand, where are the guys that were his friends? Where are the halo players and the trips and the games?

I am grieving too, still, I can’t seem to help myself. The pain sometimes is raw and fresh….

ok, ok, it is time for a little bit of lightening up...Apples and Wine

2008-09-15T23:47:00.001-07:00

Apples and Wine

Women are like apples on trees. The best ones are at the top of the tree.

Most men don't want to reach for the good ones because they are afraid of falling and getting hurt. Instead, they just take the rotten apples from the ground that aren't as good, but easy.......

The apples at the top think something is wrong with them, when in reality, they're amazing.. They just have to wait for the right man to come along, the one who's brave enough to climb all the way to the top of the tree.

Now Men....Men are like a fine wine. They begin as grapes, and it's up to women to stomp the crap out of them until they turn into something acceptable to have dinner with.

I am sad about wasted time....

2008-08-03T14:33:00.000-07:00

As I sat here on this Sunday morning and contemplate my life, which has become vastly different in the last 3 months….

I emailed a few of my friends to touch base, worked on some home work
and was just thinking….

Many of you know that I devoted 3 years of my life, along with my husband, to building a hockey team at Utah Valley State College. I was the General Manager and my husband was the Head Coach.

We are proud of the work that we did. We were instrumental in building a team that became a powerhouse in the state of Utah and was respected all across the country, even North America.

But now I am no longer involved…politics and drama robbed me, (both of us) of my goal, dream and my wonderful job.

I sit here this morning and ask myself, what was all this worth??? I find many questions, few answers.

I thought that I was making a difference, but when someone came in and took that away…what difference was I making, really???

The major sponsors of the team, who are no longer sponsors, are heartsick. They stood by us through thick and thin and made sure that we had the money to make this team something special. They are good, moral, wonderful people.

For the past year now they have been working hard to launch a new company and I am very impressed with this company.

Not only do I know the owners personally, have had dinner in their homes, been to their children’s birthday parties, worked side by side with them on hockey, but I know them as people who want to make a difference.

That is what impresses me about this new company. They are building this company, one day at a time, at great personal and financial sacrifice to themselves, because they believe in what they are doing and I believe in it too. Please take a few minutes and read further….

http://trivani.us/ --The below is taken from their website:

Home
Trivani™ is the world’s first Purpose Marketing™ company, using the power and profit of network marketing to provide ongoing humanitarian aid around the world. Trivani’s unique business model consists of two distinct but closely intertwined entities: Trivani International and the Trivani Foundation. This business model helps Trivani fulfill its humanitarian goals through three main missions: Purpose, Health, and Prosperity.
PurposePurpose represents Trivani’s humanitarian goals and efforts. As a Trivani customer or distributor, a portion of every Trivani purchase you make goes towards a Trivani Foundation project. In addition, you can donate to a project of your choice at any time when you visit the Foundation website—regardless of your position at Trivani.
HealthHealth represents Trivani’s dedication to safe and effective consumer products. Trivani’s innovative, high-science products are some of the very best in health and personal care, following our unique Do No Harm Philosophy™, which ensures that every Trivani product is safe for you, your family, and the environment.
ProsperityProsperity represents Trivani’s unique business opportunity. With a Trivani business, you can get involved with humanitarian aid and find greater financial freedom at the same time. Trivani’s business plan offers payouts at the top of the industry, as well as extra incentives to keep you moving forward and progressing. And the best part is that anyone can get involved!
Making a significant difference in the world is easier than you think. Let Trivani help you find your purpose, and together we can build a better, brighter future.

---------------------

I want to make a difference in my life with the things that I do…I wonder if I wasted 3 years of my life, I wonder???

I have decided to start replacing my personal hygiene products with Trivani products so that just by buying from Trivani what I buy everyday, I can make a difference. Not only to others all across the world, but in my own family’s personal health. All of these products are completely safe.

You see, as I sit here on this beautiful Sabbath Day, I realize that I don’t want to waste any more time to make a difference.

Please take a minute and watch this youtube video about what these products are doing for others….( I have included a few more links for more videos).

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=CVxe_P0IUek&feature=related

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=RGYZVS-Gh9I&feature=related

The above video touches me so much as I see my friends interacting and working in these impoverished areas.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_G3an2-n11k

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Yn5MhqbRuz0

real live footage of people making a difference….

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=iKhSa5N9_1M&feature=related

After you watch these, PLEASE forward this email to as many of your contacts in your emails, facebooks, myspaces as you can…..I want to feel better about the time I am using in my life, I know that you do too, this one small email can help so many.

If you too want to buy your personal hygiene products from Trivani, go to their website http://trivani.us/ and order. The shampoos, toothpastes, mouthwash, deodorant, etc. are so safe for you and your family, more safe them anything else you can buy.

If you have any questions at all, feel free to contact me.

gg goes to college - an exercise for my Organizational Comm class

2008-07-25T21:36:00.000-07:00

1. Where were you born? (Town and state). Beech Grove, Indiana

2. How many people are in your family? Where do you fit in? My father was killed in a race car when I was 11 months old, my mom was preg with my brother, she didn’t remarry until I was a Sr in High school….so there was always three people in my family….I was the oldest child and only girl.

3. What is it about your hometown, family and roots, or upbringing that brings you the most joy, pride, or satisfaction? That my father was an INDY race car driver and that we still have those associations today. As a matter of fact, I met my husband because of the Indy 500, and we are going back this May 2009, for the 30th anniversary of when we met.

4. What would you say has been your greatest achievement or accomplishment during your lifetime? Birthing the last two of my six children at home.

5. What would you say has been or will be your greatest weakness or challenge you have overcome or will have to overcome during your lifetime? Once I overcome, overeating, that WILL be the greatest achievement of my lifetime. If food were alcohol, I would be a drunk. I use food to cope with my negative life challenges. I am in the process of working hard to change that.

6. What are some of your favorite hobbies, interests, and talents? Watching my kids or husband do their thing, anthropology, aquariums (I have two), birthing, breastfeeding, writing.

7. What is your favorite soft drink, food, and dessert?
A. Soft drink - pepsi other drink -grape Kool-Aid
B. Food – BBQ pork ribs, baked potato, really good salad
C. Dessert – chocolate cake batter ice cream at Cold Stone

8. What is your all-time favorite movie? Why? – Probably Dances with Wolves, I am not sure why as I hate the way the Indians are treated, I hate the way that it doesn’t work out, I really don’t fund it a happy movie at all, but I LOVE the grandeur, the music and sweeping panoramas, the up close look at the Indian people.

9. What is your school major, specific career choice, and what would be your ideal job?

A. School major – integrated studies – business/communication with a leadership distinction

B. Career choice – athletic director at a small NCAA d-3 or d-2 school

C. Ideal job – to be doing what I was doing, general manager for a college or pro hockey team

10. Up to this point of your life, what job has given you the most enjoyment or satisfaction? Why? If you are really talking about job, then hands down, UVSC Hockey GM, omgosh, the thrill of working hard, traveling all over, meeting players and then this time of year, helping them get settled, seeing them arrive, watching the first practices, seeing what the pieces are going to look like, seeing what they look like on the ice and watching all of that equate into success that I and the Head Coach worked so hard at…that is a remarkable feeling. -- If you are talking about volunteer jobs, then being a momma and gg, there is nothing cooler, more fun, really awesome.....

11. Out of all the people in the world who have lived or are presently living, what person do you admire more than anyone else? Why? My great grandmother, because she never stopped believing in me or loving me, even when it appeared that I deserved neither.

12. What one "word, animal, or object" would your friends and family use to describe you? Why? – Bobcat, cause I have been a fighter since the day I was born, good thing too, as I usually had/have cause to fight.

Love, momma, gg, and grape Kool-Aid

2008-07-25T11:57:00.000-07:00

It doesn’t matter how much you love your parent, what matters is how much they feel loved….

So the other day, I was leaving the house and I just checked deep in the mailbox like I always do and I felt a thick envelope. I pulled it out and it was to me from Abby.

She sent me two 5-packs of grape Kool-Aid with a note that said that she knew I was having hard time and that she knew how much I LOVE grape Kool-Aid. She wanted me to know that she was thinking of me and that she loved me.

I taped one of the 5-packs to the wall next to my desk to remind me that everything is ok, that this too shall pass…meaning my recent difficulties.

A few days later Paul was here and he said, we gave that, pointing to the Kool-Aid, to gg. I said yes, I got it in the mail and I LOVE it. He was pleased, but I found it curious that he had not put me and sending gg something in the mail, as the same person, even though he calls me gg.… lol!

Oh, and remember dear children that guilt is what makes the world go round!

Haha!!!

Marriage Prayer

2008-07-22T02:24:00.000-07:00

Lord, help us to remember
when we first met,
the strong love
that grew between us.

Help us To see the good
within the other,
and find answers to our problems.

Help us to say kind
and loving words,
and make us big enough
to ask forgiveness of the other.

Lord, Help us as we put our marriage
Into Your hands.

20 Things That We Love About Winter

2008-07-22T01:55:00.000-07:00

1. she plays with me
2. she jumps with me a lot
3. she plays xbox with me a lot
4. she loves me
5. her smile
6. her pretty eyes
7. her laugh
8. how we can always depend on her to help
9. she will always do the right thing
10. she is a hard worker
11. she is smart
12. she has common sense
13. she wants to learn how to drive
14. when people are mean to her, she is forgiving
15. Her dimples
16. Her curls
17. the way she plays with babies
18. she is always so sunny
19. she is very patient
20. she is the baby daughter

The Measure of a Man -

2008-07-22T01:49:00.000-07:00

"The measure of a man's life is in how well he strives to overcome his personal problems. Neither his temporary failures nor life’s unfair reversals or tragedies, and especially not his death, however untimely it seems, negates the value of his personal triumphs. They will go on forever - for him, for those who love him, and for all who follow after."
---Yorgason and Yorgason

The Love Between a Mother and a Daughter

2008-07-22T01:37:00.000-07:00

The Love between a Mother and a Daughter is Forever...

The love between a mother and a daughter is a bond of the strongest kind.

It is a love of the present, interwoven with memories of the past and dreams of the future.

It is strenghthened by overcoming obstacles and facing fears and challanges together.

It is having pride in each other and knowing that our love can withstand anything.

It is sacrifice and tears, laughter and hugs.

It is understanding, patience, and believing in each other.

It is wanting only the best for each other and wanting to help anytime there is a need.

It is respect, a hug, and unexpected kindness.

It is an unconditional, forever kind of love.

quoted from Barbera Cage

Paul negotiates

2008-07-12T10:24:00.000-07:00

One of the things I love the most about my life right now is grandbabies…I am not sure why, as I am a completely overwhelmed mom somedays to Tuff, Winter and Hope. Then the rest of them still need a mom but in different ways. Owen Abby and Sara are all very challenging children to mother in their adulthood, each with unique and varied needs.

I would have thought that I am a doting gg, but actually I see myself much more relaxed with my gbs (grandbabies) than I ever was with my own kids. Except for the time we lost Paul at the lake and I was frantically looking for him and terrified that I would be the one to find him face down in the lake. About that situation, I was willing to do that to save dear Abby from being the one to find him face down. Just to let you know, we found him breathing, dry and playing and all was good.

Back to my post… Paul (3 yrs old) spent the night last night and he actually did quite good. Instead of studying like I should have, I watched a movie with him and Tuff and I had a pillow right next to me on the couch and Paul fell asleep on it and he only woke up once in the night and went right back to sleep with a movie. This morning he woke up all sweet and it was so fun to see him sleepy eyed and happy. Spud had offered to get donuts and he did and Paul was really excited about that. He ate a few bites of scrambled eggs and then he wanted his donut. I said to him, Paul east two more bites of your eggs and then you can have your donut and he looks at me and says, “well, how bout four more?” I had to laugh as this was the exact same reasoning that Sara used when she was that age….life is a circle, round and round we go, always changing and evolving, but somehow we still find ourselves and the same places sometimes, just with different people.

gg goes to college - Ethics - ethical problem I have faced

2008-07-10T23:11:00.000-07:00

Ethical Question
I am drawn like a moth to the flame, I don’t want to look, shouldn’t look, but I have to look. Click here and a scroll there. 37 posts, damn, up two from yesterday. Again I don’t want to look, shouldn’t look, but I have to.

“Fat Lisa, you are out, you are a thief, you don’t know what you are talking about. Your husband can’t coach worth a damn! You stole team money and you are out and I am glad you are out.”

I don’t want to be hurt but I am. I am hurt and angry and outraged. I want to hurt someone really bad. I want to post my own post. I want to call them fat, I want to say fat people shouldn’t call others fat. But I don’t. Several times I click on the reply button, the window pops up, I start to type, then I hit the cancel x.

I want to reply so badly, I want to fight my fight, I want to defend myself. But I don’t, am I a coward? I never have been before, but I don’t know how to fight this fight, these people don’t care any more about decency, civility or even right and wrong. Oh sure, they feel that they are right AND justified. But omg! It hurts and I want to HURT someone NOW!

Next post, “Owen you are out and so stupid, you don’t count, you are out along with your thieving parents”. My gut hurts, my heartburn creeps, my head aches and my rage boils. How can people treat others this way, what dos this have to do with hockey? If you don’t like the coach ok, but what in the hell does this have to do with a hockey team?

Can I have someone work them, over? I can really see him now with two black eyes swollen and hurting and only open to little slits. I know I can stalk them and slash their tires. I can make a fake myspace and tell their daughter that she is ugly. I can call their Bishop and tell them that the son that just put in his papers was drinking and partying and having sex.

But no, I turn away from the screen and them. I swallow whatever it is that is asking me, telling me, screaming at me for action. I swallow it and I turn away.

In my last ditch attempt to be civilized, to respond to these accusations like a real human being. I hire a lawyer and at the cost of $18,000 I sue them for defamation of character. Slander all you want to little man and family. I will have my day in court. I will choose civility. I will choose decency. I will choose to walk with my head up, knowing that I NEVER stooped to your level. I WILL have my day in court and you will sit there across from me and the court and 12 of our peers will vindicate me and show you that there is a law that says you can’t hurt people by telling lies as fact.

gg goes to college - English freewrite paper

2008-07-10T23:03:00.000-07:00

Freewrite -January 28, 2008
Ask anyone on the street today if they feel safe in their own country and they would probably say yeah, I feel pretty safe”. Ask them if they felt safer pre-9-11 and they would say, I felt a lot safer before 9-11”.

Would re-instating the draft cause anyone to feel safer? A large and potent military would be able to accomplish more in our struggle to bring terrorist cells in the middle east to justice. Yet, at the same time, re-instating the draft will bring a lot of people into the military who clearly would not want to be there. If you need to be compelled to do a job, you usually don’t do it well. These reluctant soldiers would waste time and resources.

Yet, I want to feel safe in my own country! Ask anyone on the street if they feel that there are those that are plotting the destruction of the American people and p[rotary, you would hear a resounding, “Yes!”
What then is the answer?

Is the answer more troops, less troops, leaving the Middle East all together with a massive pull-put? The answer is not to force a lot of people to do what they don’t want to do. It is an interesting thing to hear that many of us believe that there are terrorists with plans not yet carried out, yet these same people are calling for troop pull-out.

Is our generation such that we are used to so many easy ways that many of us do not want to work or fight to protect our way of life? Haven’t we learned through our experiences with school yard bullies that the huge majority of the time there is no reasoning with them? When those same school yard bullies add into their minds the ideals of religion that encourage and support and excuse the destruction of another human life, then that is enough for me to realize that the ability to reason with this kind of person has long gone.

gg goes to college - English paper - Aim to entertain

2008-07-10T23:00:00.000-07:00

Ahhh marriage, something that I think that I know about…or do I?

How can I say that I know about marriage when I did not grow up in a marriage? For instance, I never saw a husband and wife fight, does that matter? Well, when I fight with my husband, is it always the end of the world? I think so!

I never saw a husband and wife make-up, so does every make-up have to be dynamic and fairy–taleish?

Do married couples stop having sex? If so, when? Do they have to? Who cares?

Did not growing up in a marriage hurt my marriage?
Aim-inquire

The ladies my age in my neighborhood are just that, ladies. They have all cut their hair short, they wear frumpy clothes and flat shoes, no longer wear make-up and appear for all intent to have left being feminine and sensual far behind.

At the ripe old age of fifty, they have given up the ghost, rolled up their knee high hose and became matronly. Bah! Women in the late forties are rumored to be in a sexual surge! Well, not in my neighborhood!

Am I destined to be the only non-lady in my neighborhood enjoying a rich, wonderful, crazy, sex life? Well, it appears so!

gg goes to college- 1st Public Speaking Speach - My Eulogy

2008-07-10T22:54:00.000-07:00

Today I am here at the end of a very long journey, today I am here to say good bye to Lisa Lynn Packard Beaudry. She finished her life as she lived her life, full of passion, love and exuberance.

She was my friend, confidant, co-worker and I would have it no other way. Lisa epitomized the phrase, ‘a friend doesn’t chastise you for being arrested, she says Wow, what a crazy night!’

Lisa was a funny, talented, fun loving person. She was also one of the most caring individuals that I have ever met. She was truly there for those she loved and once you were in her circle, you were in.

Lisa was there for so many people, she spent her money on those that were needy, she would give money to the panhandlers, to the neighborhood kids and she forgave anyone for making a mistake that they were too ignorant to understand the outcome. But, she would always hold you accountable for your mistakes.

I have never met a more passionate person. She loved and loved deeply, she worked hard at everything she did and she worked hard for those she loved. She had a favorite quote that she often thought of, it is from Wayne Gretzsky, “=="The highest compliment that you can pay me is to say that I work hard every day, that I never dog it."

She started her life the young baby girl of a race car driver who adored her for the short eleven months that he was alive. That made trouble for each and every man that followed him as she would measure them all to that short eleven months of being the apple of a man’s eye.

Due to her fathers occupation as a race car driver she grew up in race tracks and her love of racing, especially the sprints on a high banked dirt track, never waned. She fancied herself to be a race car driver of sorts and if fate had granted a different twist, I wouldn’t have been surprised to see her racing sprints, stocks and Indy cars herself. She enjoyed a good race until the day she died and I am sure that she has made arrangements to see a few more in the next life.

Lisa’s love of racing came from a true competitive spirit and it was this competitiveness that fueled much of her life.

There was one man after Lisa’s father that she was crazy about; Matt Beaudry, she nicknamed him ‘Bo’, after a playful turn of events concerning the girl that introduced them.

They would make their family shake their heads in wonder as it was obvious when ever they were together that the deep love they shared. They just never seemed to live together in peace.

Lisa and Bo had six children and together they raised them in love and respect. That was what made Lisa different from the huge majority of mothers in the world. She had a profound respect for her children. She treated her children as she would have wanted to be treated. She adored her children and grandbabies and loved to be called gg.

Lisa was a different kind of gg, no knitting or baking for her, in her later years she enjoyed taking her grandbabies with her on trips and vacations. She loved to engage her family in long intelligent conversations and she expected her girls and grandbaby girls to be smart and intelligent and well read. Lisa involved all of her family in her life and her doings.

As her youngest child ‘Tuffy’ was growing up she began her career with hockey. She got started managing hockey teams to help out Bo, but was quickly drawn in to the rough and graceful sport. Lisa immensely enjoyed the time that she and Bo worked hard and started and developed the team at Utah Valley University. She was forever proud of her time as a Wolverine.
Lisa didn’t stop there with hockey, she went on to be a consultant to many college and minor league teams and was grateful for very minute.

Here are a just a few of Lisa’s lifelong accomplishments;

a. She was an Olympic level archer, at one time won a contest against the archer, Daryyl Pace who went on to win a gold medal in the Olympics.

b. Even though she had originally flunked out of high school as a junior, she was able to attend day high school and night high school (full time at each) to earn her high school diploma with her graduating class.

c. She enlisted in the Marine Corps.

d. She scored a prefect score on the ASVAB, the entrance exam for the Armed Services. Because of this she was able to graduate boot camp as a Private First Class, instead of just a Private.

e. She graduated Marine Corps Boot camp. She would say about herself - ‘not so lean, not so mean, but always proud to be a Marine.’ After boot camp she was M-16 qualified as a ‘Marksman”

f. Started a small business of selling Avon cosmetics and became a state leading sales rep and promoted to a regional sales supervisor.

g. Started another small business in the printing industry and had sales in the first year of nearly two –hundred fifty thousand.

h. Started another small business of in home lingerie sales and became a state sales leader, and was promoted to a supervisor and won two trips for her and Bo, one to Rio de Janiero and the other to Hawaii.

i. Lisa realized, accepted and started the process to overcome her deep fear of birth, realizing enough knowledge, strength and courage to progress to having 3 children at home, the last of which was an 11 pound surprise breech birth.

j. She successfully navigated and managed a family while her husband went through three years of unemployment and retraining from his printing services career to a firefighting/paramedic services career.

k. She maintained a working farm with 5 kids, 2 cows, 1 horse, 4 pigs, 4 sheep, 10-15 goats, 50 chickens, 6 ducks, 20 rabbits, 3 dogs, 3 cats, etc, all while her husband was away at fire school in Denver 3 hours away and only allowed to come home on most, not all, weekends. This was for the Period from Jan 20th – May 30th. At this time she also became pregnant with Winter.

l. Lisa moved her family across country three times.

m. She routinely canned 500 quarts of food for her family each fall.

n. She started another small business in Provo of two shaved ice stands, Lisa’s Snow Shack, that employees family and brings in a extra three to four thousand a summer.

o. She enrolled in her first semester at UVSC as a full-time student for Spring 08 and earned a 3.9 gpa.

p. Lisa kept a youthful/healthy appearance and attitude her entire life.

Lisa finished her Doctorate when she was 57 years old. She taught college students for much of the rest of her life. Her favorite classes to teach were ones that caused her students to think about, learn from and better their own lives.

I know that my life is certainly better for having known her.

Our Children - Our Posterity

2008-07-10T22:37:00.000-07:00

A Daughter –
Mirrors mom, manipulates dad,
Flirts, puts, hugs and dreams,
Moistens your eyes,
Stretches your patience
Yet – makes you
Grateful to GodShe’s your daughter

A Son –
Carries your name,
Squares your shoulders,
Binds your heart,
Renews your sense of
Humor, and keeps
You on yourKnees.

Living A Legacy –

All that we are, will pass on to our children-
our loves, our hopes, our dreams, our character.

Therefore, let our thoughts be planted in rich soil and
let our actions stand tall in a child’s eyes.

Just as fruit does not fall far from the tree, children do not
Stray far from their heroes.

I hate to have regret

2008-06-22T16:57:00.000-07:00

The last time I watched him coach, I never thought to myself that this would be the last time that I see him coach. Over there on the bench, looking so fine in his suit, so immersed in what he is doing. He is a real student of the game and he loves hockey.
Sometimes I am filled with despair, sometimes with sadness and sometimes with hope. Maybe this will work out, maybe he will coach again, maybe the administration will realize what they are missing out on. But probably it won’t work out, the team will be hurt too deeply, there won’t be the depth, there won’t be the support. Admin has said, ‘we never asked for a hockey team’.

Maybe there is another team somewhere that he can be a part of. A team that needs a real leader, a good coach, a team that wants a caring individual, not just some screaming idiot.

Who knows, but for today, there is just sadness and regret…..

I hate to have regret, the last time I saw him play, I missed his goal, I was too busy talking hockey to someone else. In my mind he would always be playing and I wouldn't have to pay close attention tonight.

That night he scored a goal, so slick and rich...and I missed it. Now he won't be playing college again. I didn't know, if I had known I would have paid attention, I would not have let my eyes wander from his grace, his strength and coolness on the ice.

Maybe he will play college hockey again.

Who knows, but for today, there is only sdness and regret....

I didn't know that I would never see her floor routine again, I didn't know, I hate regret. If I had known that she would never scream across that floor and hurl herself in the air with the strength of an ox and the weight of a feather, I would have watched.

I would have never let my eyes leave her frame and I would have studied each and very move on the balance beam, so serious, so steady. I would have cheered as she catapulted herself over the vault.... these things I know will never happen again.

And today for never being able to watch her do those things again, I have only sadness and regret.

Father's Day 2008

2008-06-15T21:11:00.000-07:00

Good day, hot day, the whole family was here in various moods and with varying amounts of love. Spud (grandpa??? I am NOT calling him grandpa) and I took Nona (Avery) to the store with us. First to Sam's Club then to Smith's. Funny, funny little girl with tons of attitude. I enjoyed having her with us and so did Bo. It was also just nice to be with my husband. The three of us had a good time.

After a good BBQ of Brats and side dishes we talked and enjoyed all of our children's company. Nice peaceful day.

As it was getting dark, Nona wanted to get in the tub and Spud volunteered gg to get in with her, yet as I eased my tired chubby bod down into the luxery of a hot bath, Nona changed her mind. Then here comes Paul streaking in.

As I scrubbed his skin I told him that we had to scrub his face, neck, front and back and shoulders. If we didn't scrub all of the dirt off, I told him, potatoes would grow in the dirt on his neck!

Flashback to 40 years ago when my Grandma Vannote told me the same thing. Seated on the toilet in the bathroom, right next to the tub, she would scrub and scrub. I told Paul that my gg told me that too and that she would scrub and scrub until I felt raw, but it also felt so good! Then I would fall sound asleep and I told Paul that I never have slept as good as in the bed my gg made me.

I also told Paul that each and everynight at my Grandma Vannotes was always the same bathtime scrubbing and then I stopped. I realized that it was not the same, the last few years that I stayed at her house, before she moved into the assisted living cnter, she asked me to scrub her back and to help her. I was filled with sadness as I realized that I was not there for her like she needed me to be, I started to cry, I loved her so very much and yet I had no clue what was expected of me back then as a tender child.

Yet as tears feel down my face, I was careful with myself and I knew that I did the best I could with what I had and that hopefully she is looking down on me. She knows that I did the best that I could and I know that she loves me still.